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Gard's laws on love
...or things that make you go... Aaaaaaaaaargh!!!
- If you meet a woman, and you like her, then she...
If a girl likes you, then you won't know before
she has lost her interest in you and it is impossible to get her back.
If you meet a girl who likes you, and you like
her, and she doesn't have a boyfriend, then she will have one within the
week, and it isn't you.
The only way to win a girl is to take her love
for granted (if you keep questioning it, she'll get tired of you).
If you take love for granted, everything will
just go to hell.
If you don't have a girlfriend, there's always
someone to remind you about it.
If you know a girl, date her, etc. etc. and in
the end tell her that you love her, you won't hear from her again for the
rest of your life.
About who picks you up:
- has a boyfriend
- is lesbian
- has many friends she prefers to you
- doesn't notice you're there
If you have a friend who knows a girl who is desperately
looking for a boy, he'll splice her with someone else.
About finding love:
- If you're heterosexual, then homosexuals will try to pick you up.
- If you're homosexual, then heterosexuals will try to pick you up.
- If you're bi-sexual, then noone will try to pick you up.
There's always someone who is happy for his/her
entire life, and it isn't you.
If you both love something, she'll hate it next
- If you hope that you have found love, you'll get very disappointed.
- If you think that you have found love, you're wrong.
- If you know that you have found love, you have been misinformed.
- If you have found love, you won't know about it before it is
If she's having a good time, it's not because
- If you don't have anything to lose, you won't win.
- If you have something to lose, you'll lose it.
- If you don't have anything to win, you'll win so that you can lose
- If she didn't say anything, she'll bring her boyfriend she never told
- If she arrives with her girlfriend, it's because she wants some kind
of protection, not to put the two of you together.
- If she comes alone, it's because she looks at you as a friend, and
there isn't a chance in the world you'll ever be more than a friend.
Gard Eggesbø Abrahamsen,
with the exception of a few rules by Kai